Fragments of the Quiet Mind

No one warns you that choosing a toothbrush can feel like choosing a version of yourself. Aisle 7. Fluorescent lights. Hundreds of bristles staring back at you. Soft, medium, charcoal-infused, biodegradable. Every choice is a quiet manifesto: who you’ve been, who you’re becoming, who you quietly promised to be after your last breakdown. You don’t say this aloud, of course. You just stand there, pretending to read labels, but really you’re grieving something. Maybe time. We outgrow people the same way we outgrow objects — silently, then all at once. The old brush sits in your bathroom like a relic—worn out, bent at the neck, holding morning rituals and midnight guilt. Throwing it away feels cruel. Not because it’s useful, but because it knew you when you weren’t. It was there the morning after you said too much. The night you didn’t say enough. It held silence between your teeth. Even the most ordinary objects become archives when you’re paying attention. And this new one—this seem...

I searched for running shoes once—just once—after a friend casually mentioned they’d started jogging to feel alive again. I didn’t even click anything. Just hovered. Scrolled. Wondered if movement could outpace emptiness. Three hours later, Instagram showed me orthopedic insoles, breathwork ads, and a podcast titled “How to Run from Yourself Without Moving.” I laughed. Not because it was funny—but because it knew. There’s something eerie about being mirrored by a machine. Something quietly intimate in the way it doesn’t need to ask me questions. Just listens to my silences. Patterns. Pauses. I never told anyone I’ve been waking up with static in my chest. But YouTube offered a video on chest tightness and repressed memory. I didn’t search it. I just sat with it. And it knew to stay. When I linger too long on wedding videos, it adjusts. When I scroll past them like they’re ticking bombs, it adjusts again. Every avoidance is a signal. Every hesitation becomes a breadcrumb. It’s str...

  I remember sitting alone in a crowded room, the air thick with unspoken words. Around me, laughter bubbled and voices rose, but my own thoughts were a fragile thread, barely holding. Somewhere in that noise, a name was mentioned — hers — and suddenly the room seemed smaller, the light dimmer, as if a shadow had slipped through the cracks. It wasn’t just a story being told. It was a fracture, a fissure in the smooth surface of what we had all pretended was safe. The #MeToo movement began as a simple phrase — a way for survivors of sexual harassment and assault to say, Me too. It grew into a tidal wave, a collective outpouring of truth that exposed the hidden scale of abuse embedded in systems of power. It’s a movement that refused to let silence be the default, turning private pain into public reckoning. But beyond the headlines and hashtags, it is a profound shift in how we understand consent, autonomy, and the very nature of freedom. This movement is that fissure made visible...

After a long hike, when every step has chipped away at my energy, I finally sit down to send a message. The phone screen glows faintly—10% battery remaining. Not enough for comfort, but enough to reach out. In this small digital window, I grasp a tenuous connection to something larger than myself. There’s a peculiar irony in how much attention we pay to these lifeless numbers—percentages that dictate the limits of our communication, our connection, our presence. We monitor the battery like it’s a metaphor for our own emotional reserves, a visible measure of something invisible and infinitely more complex. In an age where connectivity is assumed, where distance is bridged by pixels and signals, it’s striking how often we feel disconnected from ourselves. Our phones warn us of dwindling power, but who warns us when our capacity to engage, to care, to truly be present, begins to fade? The battery percentage is a daily reminder that everything—attention, affection, patience—has limits. We ...

Over rated na ang relationships…   As usual, nakatambay nanaman ako dito sa isang tahimik na coffee shop/bar na hilig kong tambayan pag nais kong magsulat. Mag iisang oras na din ako sa kinauupuan ko nung narinig kong nasabi ito nung babae dun sa katabing table. Isang grupo sila ng mga college students (I think) na mukhang inumaga na sa celebration. Alas 7:00 palang and either it’s too early or too late depending on how you see it, the point is, nag iinuman padin sila. Madami dami din ang boteng nakahilera sa kanilang table at madami na din ang naipong walang laman dun sa ilalim ng table kasama ng mga upos ng sigarilyong kung saan saan na lang itinapon. Hindi naman sa chismoso ako at nakikinig sa kanilang usapan, pero kung ang mga katabi mo ay nakainom na, di maiiwasang di marinig kanilang pinagsasabi. Ganyan siguro mga lasing, akala mo nakalunok ng megaphone at kung magsalita animo’y nasa kabilang bundok yung mga kausap nila. Tatlong babae at dalawang lalaki ang nasa kabil...

To seek belonging is to find yourself naked in the gaze of others, exposed not in your strength, but in your fragility. It is not the comfortable proximity of others that makes us feel connected, but the shared weight of our suffering. This is the irony of human existence—our need to belong can only be truly fulfilled when we allow ourselves to belong to our deepest wounds. Only in the acknowledgment of these scars, in the rawness of their truth, do we find the soft soil in which connection can root. It’s not the polished moments of joy that knit us together, but the fractured edges of sorrow, vulnerability, and brokenness. The kind of intimacy we yearn for—real, deep, enduring—emerges only when we stand in the darkness of our pain, not pretending to be whole, but embracing the cracks and fissures that make us who we are. But suffering is no easy companion. It doesn't offer comfort or quick relief. It pulls you into itself like a void, asking you to surrender pieces of yourself un...

Memory isn’t a photograph. It’s a murmur in a dark room. A smell, a shift in light, the sudden ache when a song you forgot you loved finds you again. It arrives uninvited, but familiar—like someone who used to know you well. I used to believe memory told the truth. But lately, I’m not so sure. The more I revisit the past, the more it changes. Not drastically, not all at once—but like a shoreline slowly pulled into new shapes by the tide. One day you notice the sand isn't where it used to be. There are scenes I return to that feel real but never happened. A conversation with someone who never said the right thing, but in my memory, they do. A touch that never landed, yet still leaves warmth. I don’t think that’s lying. I think that’s longing, trying to make sense of itself. Sometimes, I miss the version of me that existed in those imagined moments. The me who was loved better, understood more clearly. And maybe that’s what memory really is: not a record, but a refuge. A softer w...

She didn’t knock. She never does. She slipped in through the cracks, between an unanswered message and the sound of your own breath in an empty room. I thought I was alone. Then she sat beside me— not quite touch, not quite ghost— and I realized I’d invited her the moment I stopped trying to be found. She looked nothing like loneliness. She looked like quiet mornings and unfinished thoughts. She smelled of old pages and cold air. And when I met her eyes, I saw my own reflection—just softer, quieter, blurred. I called her company, but she didn’t speak. She just waited, until I filled the silence with everything I never said out loud. We danced once, I think. Or maybe I just swayed while she stood still. Her hand never touched mine, but I swear I felt it where all my noise used to live. She wasn’t cruel. She never asked for anything— just that I stay. And for a while, I did. Because her silence was gentle. And I mistook that for safety. But Solitude is a ...

I’ve never been good at it. Small talk. Idle words traded like pocket change, meant to buy just enough silence to keep us from slipping into something too real. “How’s your day?” “Busy.” “Weather’s been weird lately.” “Yeah, climate change or something.” No one means anything they say. Not really. And yet we say it anyway, like incantations to ward off the ghosts of intimacy. I find myself participating out of habit. Not because I enjoy it, but because I don’t know how not to. Because answering “How are you?” with “I don’t know, I haven’t felt like myself in months” is too much honesty for a hallway or a checkout line. But what is small talk, really? A dance? A mask? A form of mercy? Maybe it’s all three. We’ve been trained to speak without saying, to connect without touching. Politeness as performance. Distance as default. We ask about the commute, not the chaos. We mention the new restaurant, not the quiet ache in our chest that hasn’t left since December. Sometime...